How to stop family fights

        How to stop family fights

 It can be really difficult to witness family members fighting. When your loved ones fight, whether you're involved in it or not, you could feel upset, furious, or even embarrassed. There are a few strategies you can employ to have a composed, polite conversation with your family about your concerns. If you require additional assistance, think about contacting a mental health professional for advice.

Here are ten suggestions for managing and ending family conflicts in a constructive manner.

1. Stay cool

When members of your family are arguing, it's simple to feel angry. Instead of speaking calmly when you feel like you could yell or blow, go for a short walk around the block to defuse the situation. No matter who you're speaking to, staying cool will be considerably more effective than shouting or screaming.

Anytime you feel yourself becoming worried, you can also try taking a deep breath or counting to 10.

2. Schedule a family gathering.

Talking to everyone at once will be considerably simpler. Check to see if your family can get together at a time and day that works for everyone. After that, you can all get together and discuss your problems.

Ask your parents to organise a family gathering and invite all of your siblings if you're still a little child.

Consider inviting your extended relatives to speak with you via phone or video chat if the issue is with them.

3. Allow everyone in the family to express themselves.

 Everyone will feel as though they have a voice in the situation in this manner. Even if it looks like the other person is lying or being dramatic, don't interrupt; when it's your moment to speak, you can bring up the issue that's upsetting you. 

It can be difficult to let everyone speak, especially if they're expressing things that irritate you. But if you give everyone else a chance to speak, they'll also hear what you have to say.

4. Keep your body language neutral.

Sighing and rolling your eyes communicate a lot about what you are thinking. Try to maintain a neutral expression when listening to others speak and hide any emotions. Keep your voice tone light and avoid raising your voice or acting out of anger while you speak.

Have you ever caught someone rolling their eyes as you were speaking? You might feel even angrier than you already do as a result! Throughout the conversation, keep the peace by watching your body language.

5. Make your needs known.

Indicate your feelings and your desired course of action. Tell your family what's going on so they can decide how to help you. Remind everyone who tries to interrupt politely that you allowed them to speak, and that they must do the same for you.

For instance, you might say, "It hurts me when you yell at me over not doing my duties but don't yell at my sister. I think it's unjust that we don't receive the same treatment at home.

6. Use "I" language.

Focus on your feelings as the central issue. Try to utilise "I" comments as much as you can, rather than criticising or blaming your family. This may make individuals feel less apprehensive and more willing to discuss problems with you.

You may say, for instance, "When you yell at me, I feel terrified," instead of "You yell at me too much."

You may also say, "When you talk over me, I feel like I have no voice in what the family does," as opposed to "You never listen to me."

7. Try to remain neutral.

Keep your position impartial if you are not directly engaged in the conflict. Taking sides with parents, siblings, or other family members will only exacerbate the issue. While you consider everyone's opinions, attempt to be objective in your advise.

It might be challenging to avoid picking sides, especially if you genuinely believe that one person is right. Consider engaging a third party mediator, such as a mental health expert, if you're the adult living there.

8. Create a plan of action.

It's time to say what you'll require moving forward. Try to come up with a solution that the entire family can agree on. If you are unable to come up with the ideal answer, choose something that everyone can agree to compromise on, even if it is somewhat uncomfortable.

Consider creating a bathroom timetable with given time limitations, for instance, if you and your siblings frequently argue over who gets to use the bathroom first in the morning.

You might not be able to come up with a solution if you are not directly involved in the conflict, and that's good. Urge the other members of your family to come up with a solution that will satisfy everyone.

9. If things start to get heated, get out of here.

Family disputes can rapidly become ugly. Take notice to any yelling, screaming, or physical contact and leave immediately if it occurs. Inform everyone that you can only continue until everyone has agreed to treat one another with respect and civility.

Consult a trusted adult, such as a teacher or a guidance counsellor, if you are a child and feel that you are in danger. They can assist you in deciding what to do next.

10. Consult a mental health expert if necessary.

Sometimes, neither you nor your family can agree on a solution. If there are adults in the home, you might want to consider speaking with a family therapist. They can assist you in resolving your conflicts in a cool, collected way that benefits everyone.

To come up with solutions to family problems, you can also have a one-on-one conversation with a therapist. If your family is against treatment or you don't live close to them, this is an excellent alternative.