How to have a good family life

      How to have a good family life

Making changes in your family dynamic can foster closer ties among family members and avoid conflicts from getting in the way of everyone's enjoyment. Fortunately, there are many specific actions you can do to improve the quality and fulfilment of your time spent with your family.

1. Spending Quality Time Together

a) Keep your family's weekly and daily routines.

 A regular schedule should be followed for eating, sleeping, and doing other family activities. Routines and rituals foster a sense of stability and comfort in the home while also lowering stress. 

Regular family gatherings can be a significant element of your family routine in addition to enhancing communication.

When you can, try to practise leaving work at work and concentrating on your family when you are with them.

b) Make it a family custom to celebrate holidays and birthdays together. 

Every birthday or holiday doesn't have to involve the same activity. Consider celebrating a family member's birthday by taking them to their preferred restaurant or engaging in their preferred pastime. Although you would be continuing a tradition, the activities would be varied.

c) Have meals together as frequently as you can. 

It can be challenging to have breakfast and dinner together every day when parents work and children have after-school activities. So try to dine together as frequently as you can. A crucial ritual that might keep you connected to one another is eating meals as a family.

Even if you've already eaten, sit down with someone when they arrive home from practise or work late. More significant than eating at the same time is spending time together and conversing.

d) Make time for routine family activities.

 Walking, riding a bike, or playing cards or board games are all examples of regular activities. If at all feasible, set aside at least one afternoon or evening every week for a family activity. Keep it low-key and concentrate on having a good time and enjoying each other's company.

e) Work together on domestic tasks. 

Sharing domestic duties can encourage everyone in your family to take pleasure in your home, even though few people genuinely enjoy doing housework. By playing music or holding competitions, try to make it as enjoyable as you can. 

For instance, you could decide to see a movie together based on who folds their clothing first.

Sort the chores into groups based on age. Your youngest child could clean the table after dinner, your eldest could load the dishwasher, and you could store the leftovers.

2. Enhancing Interaction

a) Respect the opinions of your family members.

Don't ignore someone's opinion when they voice it or cut them off before they can finish. Your family will grow in trust and your relationship will be strengthened if you maintain polite, open avenues of communication. 

As an illustration, refrain from making fun of your siblings when they have an opinion. Try saying to your siblings, "I know that brothers and sisters fight, but it hurts my feelings when you make fun of everything I say," if they start picking on you.

b) Avoid making harsh judgements and criticism. 

Let each other to be foolish and express their emotions without worrying about being judged or criticised. People often hold their feelings inside and refrain from communicating them when they anticipate receiving a severe judgement.

 If you're a parent, give your kids constructive feedback that is positive and work to prevent them from passing judgement on one another. Say, "Nice try, but let me help you do this the right way," as opposed to, "No, that's not how you do things."

c) Actively pay attention to your family members. 

When you actively listen, you take in what the other person is saying and show that you are engaged. Establish eye contact with them, nod your head, and say things like, "I understand," when appropriate. Don't think about what you'll say next; just listen. Wait until the other person is finished before offering advise or your opinion.

Ask for clarification as needed. What do you mean by that? or "Was this before or after you saw them in the store?" are appropriate questions to ask.

When speaking to someone, actively listening involves putting your phone down. It's best to refrain from checking social media or your texts when having a meaningful chat.

d) Send frequent messages of love and gratitude.

 Little affectionate expressions of speech and nonverbal behaviour are quite effective. In addition to expressing "I love you," try to think of little, thoughtful ways to express your affection for one another. 

Setting a good mood by using polite words like "please" and "thank you" can help. Hugging your parents and telling them how much you value them has a significant influence. Hey, can I get you some water? You can ask your sibling if they are working on their homework and have an empty glass on their desk.

e) Keep your family separate from those you see on social media.

 It can be simple to assume that just because someone consistently appears cheerful in photos and videos, they actually feel that way all the time. It's crucial to remember, nevertheless, that every family must put effort into maintaining harmonious relationships. Just keep in mind that you don't know what someone else's family is actually like and that they probably go through family disputes and other problems like everyone else if you find yourself beginning to feel envious of their family. 

Keep in mind that just because someone else's family goes on more vacations or has more material possessions doesn't necessarily indicate they are happier than you and your family.

f) Hold positive family meetings every week. 

A family gathering need not be formal or limited to discussing serious issues. Turn off the TV, put the phones away, and spend an hour or so chatting with each other once a week. Discuss the highs and lows of the previous week, any future events, and just general small talk. 

Strive to keep your tone informal. The idea is to promote open communication, comfort, and enjoyment among all parties. What was the funniest thing that happened to you this week, for example?

Make an effort to ensure that everyone participates fairly. It could be challenging to engage young children and teenagers in conversation, but just attempt to maintain the flow.

3. Resolving Disputes as a Parent 

a) Strike a balance between your parental responsibilities and your child's desire for independence. 

Between a parent's desire to keep their child safe and a youngster's desire for freedom, there are many conflicts that arise in families. Keep your position of power, but offer your kids chances to gain your trust. gradually expanding their freedom and rights as they get older.  For instance, give your teen a curfew when they go out, and if they adhere to it for a few months, extend it a little later.

b) If you and your spouse are bickering, try to lead by example. 

If you and your spouse fight, keep in mind that the way you handle conflicts models conflict resolution for your kids. Instead of referencing prior transgressions or engaging in personal attacks, stay focused on the current issue. If necessary, settle a dispute away from your children.

c) When required, mediate arguments amongst your children. 

Allow your children to resolve their conflicts on their own if at all possible. Establish ground rules and only step in when they are broken or your children are unable to control their emotions on their own.

No punching, cursing, or naming is prohibited under the ground rules. Explain to them that they must let the other person to speak and gently express their problem.

If a conflict gets out of hand, remove the children until they are calm, and then work with them to come to a compromise. Inform them that your job is not to place blame (unless one of you hit or cursed at the other), but to assist in coming up with the best solution.

d) While resolving disputes, be clear and direct in your communication.

 It's best to avoid being ambiguous, snarky, or passive-aggressive, especially while resolving a quarrel. Let your family know what's on your mind, and urge them to do the same.

For instance, don't ignore your child or obliquely express your anger if they didn't take out the garbage. Be direct rather than stating that it is disappointing when people miss to complete their responsibilities. I'm disappointed that you didn't take out the garbage this week, Sam, so say it. If it happens again, your allowance will be withdrawn.

4. Resolving Disagreements As a Kid

 a) Recognize your parents' need to safeguard you. 

While kids need more freedom as they get older, always keep in mind that your parents are in charge. Their responsibility is to keep you secure and provide you with the resources you'll need to care for yourself as an adult. 

Remember that your parents are acting in your best interests if they forbid you from leaving the house without an adult or make you go to bed early.

Talk to your parent in a responsible manner when they're willing to negotiate something, such as a curfew. If they refuse, state your point quietly and concisely without arguing or yelling.

b) If you and a sibling are fighting, try to reach a compromise. 

Say, "Time out - let's think of a way we can agree with this," and try to avoid placing blame or placing the other person in a bad light. Maintain your composure and consider ways you two could play or share a toy. 

Ask a parent for assistance if you are unable to come up with a just solution on your own.

c) Consider things from your family member's perspective.

 Take a deep breath and attempt to maintain your composure before making assumptions. Try to understand things from their point of view before getting furious if someone stole your clothes or ate your favourite snack.

Say to yourself, "I truly don't think they did this to spite me," if your sibling took something you own, such a jacket, makeup, or a watch. Most likely, all they want to do is look cool at school by wearing this.

"I know you really enjoy my leather jacket," you should say. I realise it makes you feel awesome. Yet, it is mine, so you can't just take it without asking.

d) Whenever your parents are arguing, stay out of it. 

Just let your parents resolve their differences on their own when they are arguing. Don't try to arbitrate or interfere in any way. Until they stop fighting, move to a different room, turn on some music, or find anything else to do. 

Speak with a different family member, the school counsellor, or a different responsible adult if the disagreement gets out of hand and becomes physical.